I remember...

I remember once, we get into an arguement so badly that we both get really angry at each other for few days. But does that arguement stop us from loving each other?
No. It made us understand each other's temper more and the needs of each one of us better.

I remember once there were this time we promised to go out for a dating, but since no once can fetched you and I get really sad. So, we didn't go out so often after that due to SPM. But we promised to study hard and then we would spent a lot more time with each other. We seldom see each other face to face. But does that stop us from missing each other?
No. We maybe far away from each other physically, but our heart is always near and close to each other.

I remember once when you told me that no one really ever celebrated your birthday. So, remember what did I do for you?
I went to work at the Bakery for 3 days to produce a blueberry cake for you. You were really happy and touched by that time. You said the cake was nice and sweet. I'm happy at the same time too to see your smiling face the whole night.

I remember you used to say you're cold at night, so, at the end what did I do? I gave you away my favourite shirt for you to wear. You said you love it so much because you feel the warmth and at the same time you feel much more secure than before.

I remember all sweet things that happened in our life and of course the sad things too. This is all because I love you. I keep every of your sweet sms and your sound records too. I will read and listen to them when I miss you. Seriously, I miss you so much right now.

Happy Aniversarry, my beloved one. I love you.

- Felixson Sawing

Baby, please don't go.

Baby, please don't go.
Recently, I had this song playing on my mind. It struck. It's pretty nice and pleasant to my ears.
Today is Tuesday, 22nd Feb. Guess what? Tomorrow is 23rd of February.
What does this indicate? This is going to be the 14th months I'm with my baby. :)
I'm so sorry about what had happen last Sunday. It was not your fault, it was not my fault either.
I know I'm being over-reacting or over-sensitive for being so sensitive about the guy you chat with in the text messages.

It is not all because I don't trust you or being suspicious towards you, but it is simply that I love you so much that I couldn't afford to lose you. I couldn't. I can't make it.
I know very clearly that you are the one that I found as my true love.
Imagine, since the day we have vowed to be faithful and being together and of what we have done so far until now?
We have walked through every little details of our life whether it is good or bad. We promised to be together until the end of time. We promised to work hard together to pursue for our dreams.
I never thought I would be this devoted and why I do this? It is all because you are everything that keep me working hard, you are someone that I tressure the most.

Do you realize that I was really sad on that particular day when you told me that I was busy all the time and you took the chance to chat with that guy. It is not that I never let you to befriend with anyone but I told you, he leave me with a very bad impression. If he is so good, why do he break up with his gf? Why he needs to find you instead of letting you go with me?
It is all that nasty tactics to get you. Sigh.

No matter how, I hope everything will come back to normal. I need you.

Baby, you promised you're going to change for good isn't it?

Sometimes in life, we need to learn how to let go of something.
I know no matter what in life, we will have to go for our own way.
I've cherished every moments with you as you made every single of my day colourful.
You designed them and make them into rainbow.

Will this come true?
We have walked an amazing journey together and it has made us both who we are today.
I will not for one second trade the moments I’ve had with you for anything in the world, because I know I may never ever find them again.
I know there is a lot of growing up for me to do and I know I will continue falling and hurting myself in the process. I took a huge risk when I let go of almost everything for my studies, but I will walk this tough journey ahead with my head held high.

Education, Opportunity of the life time !

Success does not happen by chance but by the choices you make..

The first lesson I learnt was that success does not happen by chance unless you are one of the lucky few who are born rich.

If you continue to live your life one day at a time, doing what everyone does, doing things the way you have always done them, don't expect to wake up 5-10 years from now and find yourself highly successful and wealthy.
 If you want to be rich and successful anytime in the future, you have to make that choice and commitment right now. Once you decide to be rich and successful, you will tend to make very different choices in your life. You will start to think differently and behave differently. For example, you will start to open your mind to learn new things and master them or applying them.

You will start to take different actions. Instead of watching TV the whole night or playing DotA all the time, you will start to surf websites and read about success formula. Instead of reading celebrities magazine and the sports section of the newspaper, you will start to go for Secrets of Success and formulas to be in there. You will start to discuss different topics and hang around different types of people. Instead of gossiping and chit chatting about trivia, you will start to talk about future, ideal life or income.

Instead of just doing your minimum at work, you will start to take initiative and do alot more than expected. What will all this do?

It will start to move you towards success and it will only be a matter of time before you begin to see your life change positively. You will start to become more confident, more motivated. You will start to get yourself better than others.

Success is a learnable topic. You can learn how to be successful. The best place to learn how to be successful in any given area is to study and model those who have already achieved the goal that you want. By learning from those who have already found the way, you greatly cut short your learning curve and accelerate your results much faster than the average person. it works. Trust me! And I would like to give a credits to Xavier Chee and Angeline Petrus for non-stop supporting me.

As Xavier said " If your dreams can be achieved alone, it's probably not big enough. I hope we can achieve more together. Goals should not be destination, rather, they are landmarks for the journey of personal growth. And by developing ourselves to a greater heights, we make difference in people life. Living is not a selfish affair, it should be race where we pick and pull people up together to finish it. Hope we can do same to each other. "

Visit my friend, Polycarp blog too, he dreams big, a hardworker just to pursue success! http://betterme92.blogspot.com/2011/02/decision.html#more

To the world she may be one person, but to one person she may be the world.
Those thick and thin that we have been through, will never get off my mind. The times when I needed you most, you never fail to be there. I really appreciate all those thing that you've done to me and for me.

Stay away from friends who poison your mind and your soul.

In my life time, I get to meet many people who desire to make a change in their life; emotionally, mentally, physically and professionally.  For example, they get themselves to stop smoking, change their eating habits, spending patterns or even be more serious in studies as well.
However, to some of the people, the change was not sustainable. They would go back to their life and practice what they had learnt. But after a while, they would lose their focus and motivation and revert to their old limiting behaviours. Sometimes, they would not continue to apply and master the new skills they had learnt.
 At first, I could never understand why they did not continue to do what was needed to be done, to achieve what they desired so much. They had the goals and the skills. So, what was stopping them from going for it?


If You Want to Change Your Life, Begin By Changing Your Friends
After some time, I have come to realize that there is a powerful force that influences the way we behave on a consistent basis. This force shapes our beliefs, attitudes, values and life standards. It is the force of the people we choose to surround ourselves with. We can do our very best to make a change in our lives but unless we change the people we surround ourselves with, any change we make will not last. Many people fail to make a sustainable change in their life because the people they spend time with pull them in the opposite direction that they want to go to. Friends do affect you.


Friends Affect Us and Infect Us
Why are our peers such a strong influence on our behaviours? As human beings, we are creatures of conformity. We are hard-wired with the emotional need to be accepted by the people around us. And the same time, we fear rejection. To feel connected and accepted in a group, there is a tendency for us to think and act like the people in that group. Ultimately, people like people who are like themselves.
Have you ever noticed that you tend to talk and act differently when you are amongst different groups of people? All of us have different groups of friends from different social circles. For example, I have got high school's friends, university's friends and family friends.


Your Friends Affect Your Success
If friends have such a strong influence on us, we have to be very careful with who we choose to spend out time with. Whether we like it or not, our friends affect how successful we will become in our studies, relationships, careers and even our health.

I believe that we should mix around with all kinds of people from different socio-economic backgrounds, races and religions. It opens our minds and teaches us to be more understanding, compassionate and tolerant of others. There is always something we can learn from anybody, regardless of their age and experiences.
At the same time, we should consciously be aware of how much time we are spending with each group of people. Hanging around certain friends may be fun, but we should be mindful not too spend all our time with people who may subconsciously hold us back from where we want to go.


If You Want to Be a Winner, Be With Winners
Simply put, be around people who you want to be more like. If you want to be happy, hang around with happy people. If you want to become good in studies, spend time with academically successful people.
If you want to be more successful, develop relationships with people who are driven to achieve.




P/S; Let me know what you think of this post. The feedback will be very helpful to figure out about my thoughts and principle of life.
Stay away from friends who poison your mind and your soul. Instead, spend time with people who inspire you to be a better person in future.

Saturday. 12th/ Feb/ 011

I dont like food. I LOVE FOOD


Having to eat food that you like is really some kind of enjoyment, well, at least to me.
What is better than eating delicious food ?
Well, I had nice food today with my friends.

Well, it may look simple and common but they were the food that we had in some kind of Chinese Restaurant. And the price is not cheap either.

Due to the heavy workload of assingments we had last week, so we decided to go shopping in KL. We went to a lot of places today. We went to Sungei Wang Plaza, Times Square, Fahrenheit and eventually walked to Pavillion too. It was pretty fun too despite that I had a toothache the whole day long. -_________-

I didn't bought much actually but the girls did. Each of them are shopaholic. So, let the pictures do the talking. I am lazy to blog. I blog for the sake of blogging. Hahahaha! I know I talk craps right now, its because I'm hungry.



Black & White pictures are due to the IPhone aps.

Those days.

I just came back from MacDonald to had my supper and I had my shower too.
I felt so fresh and I smell nice also. I am so sorry that I couldn't find any time to update my blog because I was too busy with my assignments.
We have piles of assignments to do and it seemed that we need a long time to complete it.
I had 4 sleepless night just to finish every of sketches and collages. And even if I sleep, I only took 1-3 hours nap. Its pretty tiring. But architecture life is like that. Full with assignments and projects.

I'm feeling very unhealthy in the way I live my life. I slept late almost every nights, I didn't do any exercises, I had McD as my supper and that's the only food I can get also and I am super tired.
However, now every of the heavy workload is done although I left few assignments more to complete but I've time for them.
Somehow, today was quite a productive day minus the fact that I was late for my class, like almost everyday when I have to stay up very late for assignments. I organized two meeting which were Moral Education group and another one is Introduction To Construction Industry group. I had two meeting today and it were pretty successful as I can see everyone contributed ideas and suggestion.

Well, sometimes people feel demotivate too, aren't they? It happened to me sometimes. Sometimes I would feel very lazy and demotivate to do my work but somehow I've courage to conquer my thoughts by changing them from lazy to hardworking. So, that's how my life goes. I am filled up with assignments and projects. I am feeling like a businessman.

Valentine's Day is coming. Its 2 days away from now. Its V-Day. I miss her very much! Sometimes, whenever I am fatique or feeling demotivated, I would just look at her pictures or our album and that's be my inspiration for me to get my ass up to work. I need to work hard. Not only for a good grades or a good results, somehow, I work hard for my future and for our future. I truly believe that real and true love does change you. All I could say that I used to be an underarchiever in school before but since I met her and for the sake of our future, I need to work hard. I need to work multiple extra hard than others to be on the top. 

Our love is so true that I would think and relate anything of my life to her. I am so devoted into this. I know. I know everyone is telling that our love wouldn't last any longer since I stay so far away from her and she is NS as well as I am busy with heavy workload too. But I dont trust that. I have an instinct telling me that we're going to last forever and be together happily forever. I know my dreams, she knows hers. I need to work harder. I need to be tough and strong to face obstacles, tribulation and predicament along the journey. Its road not taken. I couldn't turn back. I just have to see and walk into my successful future. I can sense that the day is coming !

Short Update of CNY 2011

Guess what?
I am blogging in Starbucks. First time though. I am actually in Kuching International Airport waiting for the check-in counter to open. I am here early. Its all because the bus flew from Sibu to Kuching. Expected hours to reach Kuching is approximately 8 hours but the bus was fast, it took only 5 hours. -_________-

So, currently I am stucked here with a cup of Vanilla Latte as my companion. Well, if you are asking me how is my Chinese New Year celebration, I would say it is very meaningful indeed. I never left far apart from my hometown before and I never board aeroplane alone as well. It was indeed a good experience telling me that I am growing up.

I went back on last Sunday and everyone was waiting me at home to welcome me back. Of course it was my first time been away from my home so far and yet so long. So, everyone was actually eager to see me and listen to my exciting life experiences.
Everyone was there!

The next day was Sa Chap Mei ( Chinese New Year's Eve ), a day where all chinese families gather for the annual reunion dinner. Well, we did it in grandparents' house as usual every year. Grandma cooked a lot of nice and mouth-watering dishes while my aunties were actually helping her to clean and decorating the house. As usual also, my mom did nothing. She was the one who paid for every groceries and stuff. My mom is a modern mother who do nothing and let money do everything. Hahahaha!

Sa Chap Mei was a blast. We had a lot of nice dishes such as mix vegetables, roasted duck, abalone, sea cucumber soup, chicken curry and more others. I didn't capture any pictures of them though but by imagining it would make you hungry. When the clock struck twelve o'clock in the morning, every chinese families started to ignite their firecrakers and fireworks. The whole neighbourhood was hassling with explosion noise. It never stopped until two in the morning. Everyone was actually showing off their richness to buy those firecrackers and fireworks. Well, that's chinese in my hometown.

Proceed on to the first day of Chinese New Year. Everyone was wearing red except me, I am in purple. Grandmother woke up early to prepare us all this ' Mee Sua Chicken Soup ', a traditional chinese noodles. Everyone was happy and enjoyed this delicacy. As usual, for our family, we didn't visit others' houses o the first day because probably we'll do it on the second day of CNY. So, all my uncles and grandpa will play Mah Jong. I stayed at home too.
But that night I went to my girlfriend's house to visit her because she was sick. Its been a month since last time I saw her. It was all because of National Service stuff and I was in Kl to pursue my dream. It was blissful to see her and I knew that she was also happy. I went into her house and chatted with her parents, basically talking about my education stuff. Everything went well on that night. It was a sweet night indeed.

Second day of CNY was fun too. Whole family of us went to every of our relatives' houses. I ate a lot of nice food and I get a lot of red packets too or commonly known as 'ang pow' in Hokkien language. Well, that night I went to my girlfriend's house again. We were cuddling to each other while watching TV. We had a very good conversation that night, telling each other not to worry how life was going on in different places. We might be far from miles to miles but our heart is close to each other. We never feel far from each other. That's what true love is all about. Its not all about sex, its not all about money or anything. Its about how sincere you love and showing care to each other. I am proud to have her!

 Her beloved pet, BiBi.



 Her beloved would-be husband. x)

Felix and Rita :)



Well, today is the third day of CNY. And I? I am in Kuching International Airport waiting for my flight. Hopefully today will be a good day too. But I need to finish and clear every assignments left for me to be done. I need my coursemates tonight. See you again, my dearest blog. I shall update again if time allows me to do so.

Kuching International Airport. 

Life

God : Hello. Did you call Me?

Me : Called You? No. Who is this?

God : This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Me : I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am in the midst of something. (Studying theology!)

God : What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.

Me : Don't know, but I can't find free time.  Life has become like rush hour all the time.

God : Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.

Me : I understand, but I still can't figure out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU would call.

God : Well, I wanted to resolve your fight for time. Give you some clarity.

Me : Tell me, why has life become complicated now ?

God : Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Me : Why are we then constantly unhappy ?

God : Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy.

Me : But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty ?

God : Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Me : But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty. ..

God : Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

Me : If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer ?

God : Diamonds cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don't suffer. With that experience their life becomes better, not bitter.

Me : You mean to say such experience is useful ?

God : Yes.In every term, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

Me : But still, why should we go through such tests ?Why can't we be free from problems ?

God : Problems are
P urposeful
R oadblocks
O ffering
B eneficial
L essons to
E nhance
M ental
S trength.
Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

Me : Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading...

God : If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Me : Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do ?

God : Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.

Me : In tough times, how do you stay motivated ?

God : Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessings, not what you are missing.

Me : What surprises you about people ?

God : When they suffer they ask, "why me?"
When they prosper, they never ask "Why me?"
Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Me : Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here.
I can't get the answer.

God : Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be.
Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here.
Create it.
Life is not a process of discovery, but a process of creation.


Me : How can I get the best out of life ?

God : Face your past without regret.
Handle your present with confidence.
Prepare for the future without fear.

Me : One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

God : There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Me : Thank you for this wonderful chat. I am so happy to start the New Day with a new sense of
inspiration.

God : Well! Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs.Life is a mystery to solve, not a problem to resolve.
Trust Me. Live by faith and not by sight.
Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Changes

Many things have changed. From the past till the present and now.

Look around you.
Look at things around you, people around you ?
Are they much of the same ?
Anything changed within these days, months or years ?
Or maybe everything remained constant ? No changes at all.

Anything could happen.
From friends to strangers. Good to bad. Happy to sad. Ups to downs. And also the other way round.
I guess that's why life continues, isn't it ?

Maybe there's a lot of things you've lost, but I'm sure you've gained a lot too.
As for me, I've lost a few friendships, and gained a lot of new ones.
I've forgotten the stuffs I used to know, and I gained a whole lot of experiences
What if things are to remain constant forever ?

I think its no meaning for us to live anymore, is there ?
There is no way to avoid changes in life. Its a natural phenomenon.
Like I always say, go with the flow and let destiny decide.


But after all, I wish she will never change for who she are. I miss her. Seriously, only God knows how much I would do to just to make her smile.
There is so much I want to say and a lot of thoughts I wish I could share. But I can never really find the words good enough to put in a sentence that would make sense.
Sigh. I think I just keep it in heart. That's better.

Hometown

Finally I'm back to my hometown again. Place where I was breed and mould. As you all know, I came from Sibu. Well, I made final decision to go back. In fact, I didn't plan to go back because the air tickets were so expensive to purchase in this peak time. But I know everyone was missing me there. And I hope one of them is her.

Early in the morning I set out from the hostel and dragging my luggage to the gate waiting for the taxi. I went to LCCT to fly back to Kuching before I took bus back to Sibu. So, guess how long does it all takes? Approximately, its 12 hours. Adding the duration of the taxi and traffic jams. So, does it worth it? Its for you to judge.

Well, like other FNBE students do, I brought along my assignment to be complete at my hometown. I know. Celebrating Chinese New Year with assignment kills my excitement but I still feel the happiness in the air. Reached my lovely home arround 1am something in the morning. Fantastic isn't it? It is all because of the Air Asia flight delay. Blaming everything on that company.

Last but not least, its pretty nice to sleep on my own bed again :) Hahaha! And I miss her so much.